All posts for the month October, 2011

Still Alive… kind of…

Published October 8, 2011 by Jackie

I still live.  Although lately not so well. I recently discovered I had some infected kidneys and pulled lumbar muscles. The bad news is that I have been in some rough shape. The good news is I’ve had some crazy fever dreams! (see end of post) I plan on making a comic out of it soon enough. I’m getting better. Well, physically I’m getting better. Something happened a few days ago that I can’t really talk about for personal reasons. I’m trying to pretend it never happened. So, enjoy the madness. 🙂

Day two in infirmary. So very hot. White walls seem to be driving me mad. There’s screams of patients who lay here before me haunting my every waking moment. I fear my doctor and nurses are performing inhumane experiments. My time may be short.
Day two in infirmary part two. I believe my food may be a part of their experiment. It looks not of this world. Have I been picked up and targeted by foreign beings from space? Are these four walls on their mother ship? Pray for my safety. This could be bigger than all of us. Our world could be in danger.
Day two in infirmary part three. I was overtaken by hunger and finally ate the questionable meal given to me by the medic. It was salty and bitter. Upon closer examination i had discovered that the woman in the bed next to mine is missing. Is she alright? Is she even alive? Did my captors take her away? Could I have just eaten her? I will remain vigilant and find an escape. I will save us all.
Day two part four. I can feel the decent to madness exponentially growing larger and speeding faster. They have applied some experimental medication. I’m sure of it. It has opened my eyes to the world around me and all of its filth and disease. After eating human flesh I crave it again.
Day two part five. It’s quiet. Too quiet. I can feel their eyes upon me watching my every move. It’s clear to me that it’s this establishment thats gone mad. I’m as sane as ever. Wherever i am appears to have a water based bathing device. So futuristic. I must fashion my defenses from found objects and further explore this foreign place. Wish me not death. I’ll save you all from these vile creatures yet.
We interrupt this broadcast to give you a public service announcement. Those updated about space and burritos are a side effect to my illness and medication. In stead of telling everybody what i saw during my fever i decided to make it a little more comical. Please stop blowing up my phone asking me if i’m being legit or if i’ve finally lost it. Come on people. Common sense should tell you when i’m just playing around and making the best of an otherwise less than desirable situation. Don’t be dumb, kids. And now back to your scheduled broadcast.
Day 2 part 6. I saw their leader today. I swear he saw me too. He was tall and covered with what resembled tattoos commonly found on my own kind. He was in disguise and he looked right through me but let me go. Why would if do that? If if wants to destroy me if has to catch me first. The hunt is on!
Day 2 part 7. I have established shelter and discovered their mess hall back entry. I also found a payload of the space burritos. I will eat well tonight. Pray for my safety and for sunrise. I can only stay stationary for so long.
Day 3 on the lam. I had a dream in my brief hours of sleep. I had visions of a diner that had long closed down on 2nd street of where I used to live. It had the worst coffee but the best service I’ve ever experienced. What I wouldn’t do for a texas omlette and an orange juice from Aldo’s. Or maybe a beer at the silver dollar. These places are long gone and replaced by corporate trash. I can feel their eyes upon me studying my every move. I have to act and move fast. Maybe I can gain the element of surprise.
Day 3 part 2. I don’t appear to be in kansas anymore, toto. After cleverly escaping the medical facility i find myself on a foreign planet. Not a futuristic one. It seems to be even less developed than earth save for its space and travel technology. The alien children look at me with their bug eyes. I have to find a disguise. I have to blend and appear to be one of them. There is a woman walking by with a funny pair of pants. She appears to be missing a pant leg. I’m going to grab her from the bushes and take her clothes. Maybe her identity. Do they have those here? I really hope she isn’t some secret martial arts expert.
Day 3 part 3. I managed to knock the female out with a rock. At least i thought it was a female. The alien resembled a hispter emo kid in skinny jeans. Luckily their shirt is long enough to wear as a dress. Disguise is a success. The natives seem to act like humans. They take their children out and neglect them in stores, letting them throw tantrums. As sad as it is the common natives act like stupid white people in wal mart culture. The more I am exposed to how much the native aliens act like my own people, the more I remember that my people barely do anything to deserve to be saved. They watch jersey shore and other reality tv. They PAY FOR PORN EVEN THOUGH IT’S FREE ON THE INTERNET. My friends and family are too important to me to let them lay at the mercy of a hostile alien species. I can’t think like that. I can’t let them get inside my head.
Day 3 part 4. So hungry. Luckily the person i robbed had some currency. It looks like colorful construction paper and bottle caps. I don’t know what the exact worth is. Every food place seems to only sell variations of the space burritos. I’m going to try and buy one to satiate the overwhelming hunger. I saw their leader again. I tried to blend in a crowd. I’m sure if saw me. Maybe he didn’t recognise me in my disguise. Somehow i feel That’s not the case. Maybe they’re studying me. Dissecting my every move to learn about my people. It’s a shame i’ll have to kill him. He’s rather attractive for an evil alien overlord.
Day 3 part 5. My hunger has been subdued by another large spicy space burrito. I was unaware of the variety of flavors they have. It’s easily as addictive as nicotine or meth. I found an address on the wrapper. I may be here for a little while. I’ll need a way to support myself. That is unless i can get away with clubbing these creatures over the head and taking their pretty money. Maybe this factory is hiring. I don’t feel their eyes on me right now. I have to move fast and find a way back home.
Day 3 part 6. I made my way to the factory and assimilated enough of their language to gain employment. I need to find new shelter. I have reason to believe they’re following me. As i was touring the space burrito factory i saw what appear to be human shaped husks of various sizes. I couldn’t get a good enough look to confirm. This gives me a bad feeling.
Day 3 part 7. While wandering the dingy back alleys i managed to find a hiding place. There is a dumpster with a sizable rust hole in the back. I had to fight a rather large rodent for the territory and band out victorious. And with home time, too. Just as i crawled in the hole i saw a large vehicle stop. I kept myself hidden which didn’t allow me to see too much. Just enough to know they band from that infirmary. They kept talking about finding their specimen before it’s too late. Too late for what? So many alarming things. I’m still wondering about the factory. When it gets a little darker out i’m going to sneak in. This could be putting us all in danger. We could be cattle to them, ripe for the herding to be ground up. Wish me luck.
Day 4. I smell homeless. Everything on this planet seems to. I’m having a difficult time dealing with the climate changes. It resembles a desert. Hot as balls all day and colder than hell after the bills win the super bowl at night. I managed to sneak in to the factory but it wasn’t easy. This facility is heavily guarded. Why would a burrito factory need to be so well protected? I’m a little disappointed in myself. In stead of getting a good look i ate burritos and slept in an office. I have to move fast before i’m found.
Day 5. They’re on to me. I’m being hunted. I have to act quick and act now. They want to harvest us and sell us wrapped up in flour tortilla for 1.99. That’s our worth. I have to find their leader before they find me.
Day 5 part 2. Preparing for war. Raiding a junk yard and crafting weapons. When it gets dark i’m hunting for their leader.
Day 6. I found a group of mutant aliens in the sewer systems. They appear to be zombies that specifically eat vegan friendly food. I have exchanged with them some plants from the surface world for intel and reinforcements on my impending victory against their leader. His name is an illusion to me. But he is of the most evil i’ve ever heard of. He is to give a speech in 2 days time. That seems to be the best time to strike. I can hide underground and stalk my pray until then with the aid of the sewer zombies.
Day 6 part 2. Made a sword out of a stop sign. Made some throwing stars out of soup lids. Crafted some small punching darts out of car parts. Arrows out of soda cans and thin pipes as well as a bow out of fishing equipment and other things. Working on a flame thrower out of a super soaker and fire extinguisher. Rigging my boots with razor wire. I GOT THIS BITCH.